The Strength Within, Overcoming Adversity with Grace

Are you familiar with the quote, “Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it”? At times that little 10% feels more like 50% and sometimes even 100%. Life, in many ways, is unexpected, and what happens to us, especially when it’s out of our control, might determine the course of our path and future. At times, we don’t even know—and are not educated on—how to react to life, so how do we proceed, ha? I guess the answer lies in perseverance. This word makes me think of my sister-friend who carries the dynamic name of Jonette Jones.

I met her on the first day of elementary school at the age of 11. She is vibrant, passionate,

and full of life. This is all I witnessed during her fabulous and energetic dance shows and presentations, and even during a singing competition in Curaçao. I was mostly in the audience screaming and cheering her on. The dream was for her to someday join Beyoncé’s dance squad. Unfortunately, this dream was challenged at a very crucial part of our lives. One day before I moved to the Netherlands for my studies, she had an incident while we were jumping on an infamous trampoline at my cousin’s house. We were just 18, and her knee was injured. This incident unleashed a snowball of consequences that she has dealt with till the present time.

Tell me about the current chapter of your life. How would you describe it?

This chapter is called “Under Construction.” In a literal sense, I’m working on improving my health and physical well-being due to knee surgery. I’m mentally and physically exercising at physiotherapy and the gym to find a healthy routine to boost my overall health. In a figurative sense, I’m preparing myself to deal with the fact that I have Arthrosis, a chronic condition that does not have a cure.

After her third knee surgery in 2024, Jonette got the news that she had arthrosis. This is a condition where the cartilage tissue that covers the ends of your bones and helps your joints move deteriorates and may disappear completely, resulting in bone-to-bone contact causing pain, stiffness, and at times swelling. This fact led her to what she explains as a crossroad.

Many questions are popping up in my head, like, do I see my life in the Netherlands or

not? Should I invest a house here or somewhere else? This all makes me realize that I have to get to know who I am at this moment in my life. So this is the construction part, I have to construct my future.

Life happening to her this way is devastating, so I wondered how she would react to this. I was curious to know how this circumstance was shaping her.

I don’t know how having Arthrosis is changing me; I’m still processing it and am between

acceptance and denial. I’m also grieving. It’s a condition that I hope to accept as part of my life, without feeling guilty about it. Despite this being a horrible experience, I remain hopeful and am beginning to have faith that things will improve. While the outcome may not align with my own expectations or timeline, I am curious to discover what lies ahead. I refuse to believe that I'm meant to only endure this hardship, therefore, I trust that there's a purpose behind all this turbulence.

Do you have an idea of what the reason for this could be, or are you open-minded about it?

I’m currently open-minded and trying to go with the flow. The downside of going with the flow, for me, is being directionless, without a clear goal in mind. I know that if I want to take the next step to achieve something, I’d have to immerse myself in it. Dancing has always been my passion and sanctuary, providing a sense of stability even in turbulent times. I realized that dancing is the only thing I know through and through. When all else fell apart, I knew I could just dance. Now, I have to explore my identity beyond dancing. I now have to find the next thing to wholeheartedly immerse myself in.

You shared your story on social media, what was the thought behind this?

I shared my story as a reminder of my progress, as I sometimes tend to overlook it. When I underwent my first knee surgery at the age of 18, I approached it casually, eager to move past it. However, upon reflection, I realized that not everyone my age had gone through such an experience. Fast forward to 29, facing another knee surgery felt like new and unknown. It was then that I recognized how much I had forgotten about the emotions I had suppressed since 18. This pattern extended to my academic journey as well. After dedicating 7 years to my studies and graduating, I swiftly shifted focus without taking a moment to acknowledge my achievement. For this reason, I documented my second knee surgery experience to serve as a reminder that despite feeling defeated and extremely sad at the moment of surgery, I was capable of more than I thought afterwards. This recording serves as a testament to my resilience. Moreover, I realized that sharing the video was a way to connect with others in similar situations, especially fellow dancers or athletes as I felt like people around me couldn't understand the challenges I was facing, specifically in my capacity as a dancer.

Have you found someone in a similar situation to connect with?

Not yet, but I did notice that I’m very reserved. However, I did develop friendships with my physiotherapists, and I also noticed that the individuals in my physiotherapy group did not share the same condition as mine which makes it a bit challenging to connect.

What has helped you push through the knee surgeries and now with your condition?

Despite my initial anger towards my situation, I believe that God helped me navigate through it. I Admit that without his guidance, I wouldn't have been able to overcome these challenges. Besides God's support, my sense of pride also played a crucial role in pushing me through. As you may know, living abroad requires inner strength and much pride to achieve one's goals. After a particular lonely day after my knee surgery, I promised myself that it would never happen to me again. Realizing that my parents, who live in Curaçao, were not physically present to care for me, I took it upon myself to be self-reliant. That was the moment that I closed myself off and let God and pride lead.

Was it pride or were you trusting yourself?

Maybe it was my determination, but I don’t perceive it as such since I was unwilling to show any signs of vulnerability or weakness to others. Perhaps this attitude made it difficult for me to accept the support that those around me were willing to offer. I also had this same attitude with my parents, especially my mother, who I know would never judge me for being vulnerable. However, adopting this attitude and mindset helped me get though the challenging moments. My well-being was my very own responsibility and that was sufficient for me.

Are you glad that God and your pride helped you through it?

I’m happy with my relationship with God, yet I'm less satisfied with the impact of my pride, as it cost me my relationship and led to missed opportunities for deeper connections.

I painted a portrait in my head where I couldn’t ask my friends for help. I shut out many who I’d normally let in. So pride has a good and a bad side. It helped me survive, but I think it may have hurt many relationships causing me to shift from an extroverted to a more introverted person. Nevertheless, I did what I believed was best for me at that moment.

Is that approach still working?

At times it does and at times it doesn’t. But by being prideful I shield myself from potential disappointed. I hope that I can open back up soon; I’d feel more at ease that way.

What’s your biggest motivation right now?

My biggest motivation is my curiosity, as I'm convinced that something great is waiting for me out there. I have experienced great achievements in my professional and academic life; therefore, I believe that—once again—God has something great in store for me, and I'm eager to discover what it is.

be hopeful that things will get better and believe that there’s something beautiful in this experience.

For those in a similar situation, remember that you are not alone—though I struggle with this myself—and talking about your experience may inspire the person that you least expect. Also, be hopeful that things will get better and believe that there’s something beautiful in this experience. Keep dreaming, be delulu, and always wear what you please. The latter is an instant gratification method: if you look good, you will feel good, even if it’s for 5 minutes. Trust that there’s a whole life of success awaiting you!

I see her journey as a testament to the power of resilience and the authentic human spirit. We fall down and we also get back up. Her story serves as a reminder to not lose hope when life challenges us but to persevere and maintain the faith that every little thing will eventually be alright. Personally, I still hold on to the hope that one day I will see her share the stage with Beyoncé.